Madam City Woman: Lara

On my 18th birthday, maami told me the first true lie I ever heard.

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She said EVERYTHING

would be Fine.

As we sat in the balcony together under the starry night sky, she introduced me to my first dosage of adulthood with a warm smile, a huge hug and beautiful words that I naively believed at the time.

I wish maami had just told me the truth. The truth that Nothing would ever be fine again!

Perhaps if she had come right out with it instead of painting a calm, serene life in my mind at 18, I wouldn't have been so distraught at having my dreams shambled by the reality of living as an adult, and as a first daughter in today's Nigeria💔.

I never blamed her though.

I mean, how could she have known back then that, 8 years later, she would be in a life-or-death battle with cancer?.

Or that she'd be leaving her two younger children in the hands of an incompetent eldest child; namely myself!... How?

You must think I'm just too pessimistic and simply a "caregiver" of negative vibes, but ...

I'm telling you...I could easily write a 10page essay about my entire life in Nigeria that proves Maami's theory wrong, and still probably even be given an award for that essay!

I mean...

how do you explain a situation where a woman suddenly throws a freaking tumbler at her boss on the very same day she receives a life-shattering news from her little sister?

Oh!

And if you still haven't gotten the gist... that woman is me.

Yep. Me.

I threw a tumbler at my well-deserving boss and I couldn't feel prouder, or even more foolish of myself.

It's a weird thing to say, I know.

I mean, it did take me approximately 4 years to get that job—7 if you add in two ASUU strikes, one cute global pandemic, and then a delay in NYSC deployment —

but, hey!. Who's counting?!💔.

Anyway, I did what I did because, at that very moment in time, I could no longer stand the sight of that smug, self-satisfied, disgusting smile on Mr Afolayan's face as he publicly humiliated me once again.🙎

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Do you know the worst part?.

That day wasn't even his first time of doing that; neither was it the second or third.

His obvious wickedness toward me had started from the very first day 6 months ago,when I was assigned to be his paralegal manager in the firm, and till this day, I've never understood why.

However, I knew why I hated him.

The man ate like a pig, acted like a pig, and infact, had the physique of one.

I'm not joking.

I was pretty sure that the only thing going for him in that firm was his shocking brilliance with the law and his ability to bring in millions every year.

And so, dealing with Mr Afolayan was never a JJC walk for me.

I knew how to deal with the humiliation, frustration, self-esteem and pain all in the name of receiving that alert that came at the end of every month so I could pay for maami's cancer treatment and my siblings' schooling.

But on that fateful day, I finally snapped.

I guess I could blame it on everything wrong that happened to me on my way to work that day.

I could blame my slow-burning anger on the bus conductor who just decided

to die on top my matter

that morning by dragging "change" with me at Obalende bus stop.

I could also blame my flailing nerves on the old woman selling poff-poff by the side of the road who kept ignoring me like I was a rag and attending to other customers who appeared after me😤.

I could blame the dam of anger that burst in front of my boss on the mad man who splashed dirtied rain water on my cream skirt as I was hurrying to the firm, already twenty minutes late.

Yeah.

So you see?.

I blame throwing that tumbler on Lagos itself.

Lagos is a mad place with nearly half the population carrying its madness gene. The roads are usually the worst places to be on Monday mornings, because one way or the other, something is going to get you angry...as it did me that day.

Abi na lie??

But regardless the bearer of the blame, I had done it.

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If only I had known what was awaiting me at home, I would have given that bravado in me a pat on the back and told it to go "sit down".💫

If I had known, I would have just smiled as usual when Mr Afolayan completely massacred my professionalism with his words, and simply said, "I am sorry, sir".

I would have never let that morning's lagos madness get the better of me and push me into making one big mistake...

But of course, I had no idea what was going on at home.

And so, with a bravado I had never felt before, I walked away after leaving a slightly bleeding, stunned Afolayan behind with a smile on my face and a cute, little ding✨ to my step.

I felt a lifting, colorful feeling in my chest. I had done something freeing... that had for once, made me feel less of that worthless woman he had manipulated me into believing I was.

I felt...happy.

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"Aunty, commot for road jor!"

I jumped suddenly at the sound of the voice.

I looked around me and I was just in time to see the angry okada man race away.

Shocked, I realized I had somehow walked down to the Obalende junction while still in a daze.

And just then, I realized something else...

I had just lost my 80k job.

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And the news when I arrived home later on?

My 18 year old sister was 2 months pregnant.

I didn't throw a tumbler this time around.

Oh no...

I nearly killed her with my bare hands until my brother, Francis and my mother forcefully held me down.

An hour later, I found myself holding a sobbing, terrified Fadekemi in my arms.

I kept apologizing and assuring her, just like mama did to me at the same age, that everything would be fine.

And yet all I could think about??

the first lie maami told me on my own 18th birthday.

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